Creating and Following Limits

Hi all!

This one will come in handy for parents of young children as well as caregivers. 

It's vital that a child learns early on what is ok to do and what is not - this being said with a view that safety of the child and those around him is paramount. Also, without knowledge of and practising behaviours that set a limit, a child would find it very difficult to cope with interacting with others outside his or her home or family. 

Some children accept boundaries and limits more easily, whereas others might be frequently tempted to find out what your reaction to their actions would be. In dealing with such children, calling them "bad" or "naughty" is not the solution. Label the action rather than the child. Express your displeasure at the action and then let the child face the consequences. For instance, they must know that hitting another child is completely unacceptable. If they are clear about your expectations, they will probably know that their action of hitting another child means that they don't get to play with this or any other "friend" for a certain time period or that they miss out on an ice cream treat in the evening. 

There are many ways in which you can convey to child your expectations. Some of these are:

• Be the role model. There's no point lecturing if the child doesn't see others in the house doing what he or she is expected to do.
• Be consistent. If hitting other children is off limits...it's off limits-no questions asked. If it's that way every time, your child will know that it is unacceptable.
• Praise good behaviour and encourage it. Positive reinforcement works and motivates. For instance, if your child has put back her toys after playing with them, give her a hug and say thank you. Point out that she now knows exactly where to find them when she wants to play again - also no one is likely to trip on the toys scattered on the floor. Such words will make her want to please you again with other actions. 
• Play small games to keep the "setting limits" process interesting. For instance, rather than asking your child to wash her hand each time before eating, ask her if she can do it before you can finish making the salad or setting the table.  

Finally, take heart that a time will come when your child will understand that the limits you set are for her protection. Children are innately curious and will investigate everything - the world around around them, their physical abilities, their emotions and also how far they can push their luck with you!  

Happy parenting!

Music Time

Feb 12, 2013

Kids love music and rhythm. If you play music at home, you'll observe the young move to the rhythm without even realizing they are doing it. It's fun! 

If you run a school for young children, make sure music is part of the programme. You could have a musical session after indoor playtime, when children are ready to exercise their vocal cords as well as their bodies.

Music involves movement, so make sure you have adequate space. You could push the furniture to a side to create space. If you can arrange to play music outdoors, that's even better. To start the session, arrange all children in a circle and sing your favourite songs. In addition to repeating the songs that your children already know, introduce new ones regularly. 

Proceed to movement. 3-4 year olds should be able to respond to rhythm or beat while clapping if an adult is leading. 4-5 year old children should be able to respond to rhythm with body movements like jumping, swaying. Older children who are 5-6 years should have no problem responding to music with simple dance steps. Keeping their age group in minds, provide a beat and get children to clap or move (jump, march, walk, skip etc.) accordingly. Vary the beat so that they move slowly or fast according to your directions. 

Get creative with rhythmic movements. You could ask children to mimic animal movements to a drum beat - for instance, galloping like a horse or hopping like a bunny. Ensure they vary their speed according to the rhythm. Use a drum to provide the beat - or if you don't have one, you could just use a bell or even a metal spoon and container to achieve the same. The idea is just to provide the rhythm for kids to follow. 

Action songs provide both music as well as opportunity for rhythmic movement. For instance, if children sing "Here we go round the mulberry bush" they could not just move in a circle but also perform actions such as brushing their teeth, combing hair etc. as per the dictates of the song. 

To end the session, have the children sit in their circle again and sing some soothing, quiet songs. Once in a while, just play music and them enjoy a free style dancing session! There's nothing as liberating (for adults too!!) as swaying to music. 

While all of the above was intended for a pre-school setting, parents with small children can follow exactly the same at home. Participate in the activity with your child, or get some children from the neighbourhood together and then have a musical session as a group. As far as possible, plan activities that involve the use of the whole body. This can include making a "train" and then moving to the "choo-choo" rhythm. They will enjoy it thoroughly.